Journal · Wanderlust

Life, oh Life!

Today has been an interesting day. After having a great class in the morning and OK class in the middle of the day, I was oh-so-happy to end my day with the WORST CLASS I HAVE EVER HAD. I’ve had these kids nearly every week since I started, but they’ve never really warmed up to me.

For the past 3 weeks, I’ve had the whole class together (it usually splits in two) two times a week. So, today, while the kids refused do what I specifically asked them to and they talked back to me, the teacher sat there and did nothing. Absolutely nothing. In fact, she seems to think it’s funny when the kids don’t pay attention and talk among themselves. It was wonderful.

On my walk home, I decided, once and for all, that I never want to be a teacher. Sure, I love teaching the classes full of kids excited to learn, who ask questions and listen when I talk (like the class I started my day with), but the bad classes, full of little shits, just ruin everything. Today has even led me to question whether I want to stay in this position next year, (that is, if I’m offered a job). Anyway, I’m going to have to give these kids a verbal beat-down auf Deutsch when I have them next week — nothing else has worked.

Further, to make this day better, I received an email from a hotel that I thought would hire me (Frankie had referred me, and is working there this summer). Turns out, they have nothing to offer me. So, it’s looking more and more likely I’ll be home in Michigan this summer, which, thankfully, is also seeming less and less horrible.

I’ll admit: I miss Michigan. I miss my family and friends and dogs. I miss having money in my bank at the end of each pay cycle. I want to have a place/home that I will live in forΒ  more than 8 months and I want to start a “real life.” But I know most of these sentiments will change once a plan of action is in place — so functions my tiny, flighty, fickle brain.

Blah. Just blah. It’s one of those days where I question everything going on in my life. Maybe one of these days, everything will make sense and there will be a big lightbulb and angels singing. Until then, you’ll get to read about all of my messes here. πŸ™‚

Cheers,
Alaina

2 thoughts on “Life, oh Life!

  1. i feel like we are at the age where we are supposed to question everything. i did it just this morning via telephone meltdown with my mother.
    we have to just believe it will all work out.

    and those little shit austrian kids… kick some ass. american style πŸ˜‰

  2. Yah, the next time you have those kids, put them in their snot-nosed places! I can’t wait to hear about it when it happens πŸ˜‰ Meanwhile, it’s great to hear about your trials and tribulations & your celebrations and musings! Keep writin’ πŸ˜‰
    ps – bright lights and angels sounds like a near death experience, not an ah-ha moment…

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